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Links of the Week – December 12, 2014


* Light Painting

* Motion Exposure

* Kids’ Drawings Speak Volumes About Home

* Old And Overmedicated: The Real Drug Problem In Nursing Homes

* Mall Santa Poses For Best Santa Photo Ever

* Right Whales Begin Migration To Georgia, Florida

* NASA Takes One Small Step Back Into Space: But Is Orion Really Taking Us In The Right Direction?

* Santa, Don’t Pigeonhole My Kid

* Behind The Picture: The Photo That Changed The Face Of AIDS

* When Someone Shows You Who They Are, Believe Them

* 5 Tips To Stop Dating ‘Fixer-Upper’ Guys

* SpaceX Will Try To Land Rocket On Floating Ocean Platform Next Week – (AWESOMESAUCE!)

* trekbedtimestories: This Is A Thing You Can Buy

* All Kirked Up And No Place To Go – (“There’s a man out there!”)

* A Man Selling His Koala Makes The Best Craigslist Post Ever

* Hudson’s Hickory House, Douglasville – (Tastes like home. We’ve eaten there so much they sent flowers to Daddy’s funeral.)

* No Love For Leather: Nike’s Innovative Vapor 360 Baseball Glove Is Here

* Dick Allen May Not Be In The Hall Of Fame, But Here Are Six Reasons He’s In The Cut4 o’ Fame

* The Driver Behind Public Transportation’s Transformation In Atlanta

* What Will It Take To Run A 2-Hour Marathon – (Fantastic article!)

* Man’s Family Rises To Record High Fourth Priority

* Heart Of Winter Frozen Forest Glow In The Dark Necklace – ❤ ❤ ❤

* Ken Weatherwax, Pugsley On ‘The Addams Family,’ dies at 59

* Rape Rage Driving Feminism’s Third Wave

* North Pole Reindeer Baseball Cards – (Click through on the Baseball Reference link on the bottom of the cards. Donner played in the minors for Rankinbas!)

* Nerdy Nativity Scene

* Pope Rummaging Through Vatican Basement For Plastic Nativity Scene Figures – (The. BEST! 😀 )

* Last Christmas I Swallowed A Ball Of Yarn…

* Lumpy Space Princess Sweatshirt – (Oh my glob!)

* Lumpy Space Princess Plushie – (Dawwwwwwww!)

* Chastity Sweater – (I don’t think this guy has anything to worry about.)

* Full Moonrise Hike At Stone Mountain January 4th – (This should be amazing!)



Fred Jones was worn down
from caring for his often
screaming and crying wife
burning the day but
He couldn’t sleep at night for fear that she
In a stupor from the drugs that didn’t
ease the pain would set the house ablaze
with a cigarette.



Battle For Black Rock 12 Mile-ish Trail Race


What do you get when you mix cold and rain and mountail trails? MUD!!!!

Sean Blanton, the Run Bum, puts on my very favorite races. His are no-frills, scenic, mountain goat races that will kick your ass AND be the most fun you’ve ever had running!

Yesterday was the Battle for Black Rock at North Georgia’s Black Rock Mountain State Park. You could chose the 12 mile race, the 24 mile race, or the 36 mile race. A few months ago I considered the 36 miler, but decided I’d wait until next year to start moving towards ultra distances.

Thank GOD! I forgot that 12 mountain miles in a Run Bum race are like, maybe, 18 or twenty regular running miles!

I can’t explain to you how wet and slippery the trails were. I slipped and fell eight or ten times. All my years of sliding into bases playing softball was actually a big help. Most of my falls yesterday just turned into nice hook slides.

It felt like the whole race was uphill and there were some steep hills that were so muddy and slippery that I had to just drag myself up on my hands and knees using roots. You can only imagine the footing trying to slip, slide and run DOWN the hills!

When we started, Sean said he really wasn’t sure what the distance would be – just something around 12. Thank goodness it only turned out to be 9.81. If I’d had to deal with two more miles of hills, my quads might have exploded!

I finished and I was covered in mud, and soaking wet and freezing cold. The race was tougher than my marathon. Even though it was an hour shorter, the terrain just shreds your legs. I was HURTING! But it was probably the most fun thing I’ve done all year!

That’s how you know it’s epic. When the hardest thing you do is also the most fun, you know, at least for that day, that you’ve lived your life to the fullest!

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9.81 miles
Avg. Pace: 21:37
Avg. HR: 156
Calories: 1724

Elevation Gain: 2757 feet

Race Results: I didn’t finish last!!!


  1. 10:19 – Elev. Gain: 258 Elev. Loss: 210
  2. 18:21 – Elev. Gain: 302 Elev. Loss: 188
  3. 22:58 – Elev. Gain: 21 Elev. Loss: 696
  4. 21:17 – Elev. Gain: 34 Elev. Loss: 558
  5. 17:51 – Elev. Gain: 67 Elev. Loss: 22
  6. 28:38 – Elev. Gain: 668 Elev. Loss: 36
  7. 16:28 – Elev. Gain: 102 Elev. Loss: 528
  8. 31:23 – Elev. Gain: 553 Elev. Loss: 218
  9. 27:41 – Elev. Gain: 460 Elev. Loss: 65
  10. 17:08 – Elev. Gain: 293 Elev. Loss: 120

“It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great!”
– Jimmy Dugan, “A League of their Own”

A Great Day For A Little Run


Black Rock Mountain State Park
12 miles of mountain trail
Pouring rain

Let’s do this EPIC SHIT!

Atlanta Half Marathon 2014

20141127_105253Atlanta Half Marathon

Nothing gets you out of your own head for a while like a little run. 2:13:45 – a good time for me on a very hilly course three weeks out from a marathon.

Age Group: 127/298
Gender: 1522/3149


  1. 10:32
  2. 10:16
  3. 10:20
  4. 9:50
  5. 10:17
  6. 9:48
  7. 9:53
  8. 10:06
  9. 10:04
  10. 9:56
  11. 10:00
  12. 10:23
  13. 9:29
  14. 8:18

Avg Pace: 10:02
Avg HR: 168
Calories: 1227

Next Race: Battle for Black Rock 12m Trail Race – December 6


Tybee Island: Race Day!

And we’ve finally made it to race day!

My Race Report

Savannah Rock n’ Roll Marathon

A Nickle Bag of Funk

Fannies On The Beach

Pour One Out for Colt 45


St. Mark is one of the few churches along Peachtree Street here in Atlanta that still allows homeless folks to sleep on its steps. Even that statement sounds callous, but it’s a degree better than those churches that have posted “No Loitering” signs out front to keep these needy men and women away from true sanctuary. You know, like Jesus said in his Sermon on the Mount, “Fuck you who are poor. Get the hell off my lawn and kiss every inch of my black ass.”

A group of four or five guys regularly sleep on our handicap ramp out front of St. Mark. I jog past on my early Saturday runs and see them out there wrapped up in their blankets and using all their possessions as pillows. It makes me happy and sad. Happy that they feel safe and welcome there in the shadow of our big red front doors, but sad that there are people who have no shelter from the elements, or who, for some reason, choose not to take advantage of the shelter that’s available.

Yesterday, when Beth, our pastor, stood up to take prayer requests, she began by saying she had a very sad announcement. One of those ramp guys, Mike, had passed away in the night out there on that concrete ramp. A man, a child of God created in God’s image, died on a cold Sunday morning on the steps of a god damned church in the United States of America.

Beth said Mike was better known around the church and on the streets as “Colt 45,” because every night he’d drink a can of Colt 45, crush the empty and toss it in the bushes in front of the church. I’ve seen those cans. I might have served Mike some food at Breakfast Club, or poured him a cup of coffee. Chances are good I passed him walking down the street at some point and we probably smiled and said hi. But I can’t remember who he is.

But I remember those cans. Colt 45. The Bull! Those cans were a sign. A sign that a human being had been there and was visible and real and tangible in this world. That human being was a man named Mike.

So tonight I’ll buy a can of Colt 45 and pour it out for Mike. And then I’m going to throw the empty down next to one of those “No Loitering” signs at the church up the street. And they can kiss every inch of my black ass.

Rest in peace, Mike. I’m sorry we couldn’t do better by you.

Updated 11/19/14

More about Mike

Tybee Island: Day 2 – A Very Beachy Birthday

Sunrise over the beach, The Breakfast Club (OMG good!), Ft. Pulaski National Monument, The Crab Shack, Tybee Lighthouse, Tybee Island Marine Science Center, Tybee Pier & Pavilion, Lighthouse Pizza for carbo loading before the race and a full moon over the Atlantic Ocean. (More pics from Ft. Pulaski and The Crab Shack coming later!)



Tybee Island: Day 1

The first day of my trip to Tybee Island and Savannah for the 2014 Savannah Rock n’ Roll Marathon.

I Did It! – 26.2 – 4:58:02


I went into this race, the Savannah Rock n’ Roll Marathon, knowing that my training had fallen apart during the last month. I’d only run 37 miles in the last three weeks. My initial goal was to break 5:00:00. I’d have to run a 11:26 pace to do that.

I knew that my body was feeling pretty good with all the “rest” I’d gotten, but I knew at the same time, I wasn’t in the same shape I had been aerobically three weeks ago. I realized I’d have to run the smartest, most disciplined race of my life to hit my goal. I’d have to pace, drink and GU just right.

I had my Garmin set to track elapsed time, distance and last mile pace. (If I set it to more than three data fields, my old eyes have trouble reading it while I run.) Sometimes I also show my heart rate on my watch, but I generally know if I start getting out of breath that my heart rate’s too high.

I also had a 5 hour pace band on my wrist that I got at the race expo. It gave me the splits I’d need to hit for my goal. This turned out to be incredibly helpful!

I also had seven Chocolate Outrage GUs and my water belt.

The gun went off at 7am and about 20 minutes later, out of Corral 14, I hit the start line.

Course Map

I did a pretty good job hanging close to my pace time. Some people can hit every mile split within a second or two of their goal pace. I’m not one of those people. I’d go a little under and make up for it by going a little over. I tried to feel my breathing and run relaxed and under control.

I can’t begin to explain how wonderful, friendly and welcoming the people of Savannah were as we ran through their neighborhoods. It reminded me that although Atlanta isn’t exactly rude, it is kind of hard. It doesn’t have the spirit and soul of the south anymore. Old men and children waved to us from their porches. We ran in the shade under huge oaks draped with spanish moss and along cobblestone streets. It was delightful!

Then, around mile 11.5, the full split off from the half, and we ran on the expressway – the Harry Truman Parkway to be exact. It was hot. But it made me giggle when people were bemoaning “the hills.” It was clear they didn’t do their training in Atlanta.

We ran about 2 miles on the parkway and then turned and ran about a mile and a half to the Savannah State campus. We hit the entrance at mile 15. It had gotten really warm by this time, there hadn’t been much shade, and I was a little worried because I didn’t seem to be sweating. I had drunk a couple of cups of water at every water stop – there’d probably been six or seven by this point – and I’d sipped my water bottle almost dry. I’d had three GUs, one every 45 minutes.

Halfway around the campus loop at mile 16, I started feeling spent – not sick or dizzy or anything – just overheated and thirsty. I hadn’t walked at all at this point, except to drink at the water stops. I’d been running for three hours straight.

It was time for another GU, so I ate that and drank the last sip of water in my bottle. We ran on through the campus and did a lap around their track in the football stadium and left the campus at mile 17. Thank goodness, there was a water stop really soon after.

I drank a cup of water and poured one on my face. This cooled me off and the GU kicked in and I felt better.

18 miles is where I’ve lost it completely in my other two marathons. I was about four minutes ahead of my goal time at this point and felt like I could probably experiment with walking for 30 seconds at the beginning of each mile. I knew I needed to conserve my energy.

The walk breaks turned out to be a good strategy for a couple of reasons. In my other two marathons, I started walking at mile 18 with no real rhyme or reason because I was tired and wound up giving up and walking way too much of the rest of the race.

The 30 second planned walk breaks in this race let me get my heart rate down a little (once it gets too high, it’s tough to get back down) and also gave me something to look forward to at the end of each mile. I’d look at my watch and see 18.73 miles and tell myself, “Just keep running! You can rest in just .27 miles.” It really helped me break the end of the race down into manageable chunks mentally and physically, instead of thinking of it as “Oh my God! I’ve still got to run 7 more miles!”

At some point during mile 18, there was another blessed water stop. I drank a couple of cups of water and asked if they could fill up my water bottle. The young man said, “Just go over there and dip it in that big garbage can full of ice water that we’re using to fill our pitcher.”

I tell you, if there is a heaven, it will be like that moment when I stuck my entire arm down into that bucket of ice water. I think that was the moment that got me through the end of the race. Not to mention that it simply refilled my water bottle. There should be a new parable written about that moment, because Jesus was in it!

I went on with my run-walk plan but really started wearing out about mile 20. But I was SO close to meeting my goal. I didn’t want to ruin it after all the mental and physical struggle I’d gone through over the last four months training and the last four hours running! So I kept chugging.

About 22.5, we had looped around to run the “back” of the out and back section of Harry Truman Parkway. Only a 5K left to go. I wasn’t even pretending anymore. I was unhappy. I won’t say I was miserable; I wasn’t even particularly hurting. I guess the way to explain it is that I felt “empty.”

At mile 24, I wanted to quit. I just wanted to walk it in. I walked for the first minute of that mile. I was fighting myself so hard. It was that same moment I had in that 20 mile training run where that thing clicked in my brain at mile 10 and I quit. That “thing” was screaming at me to quit, to give up.

I KNEW if I came this close and then gave up with two miles left I would never forgive myself – literally. And I was actually afraid that if I blew this shot at breaking 5 hours, I’d feel like I had to do all this training again and take ANOTHER shot at it. Like I told somebody earlier in the race, I don’t ever want to have to get up at 4:15am again in my life unless the house is on fire and somebody already tried and failed to extinguish it.

I didn’t have some big inspirational moment where I gave myself a “You Can Do It!” pep talk. I just put my head down, looked at the pavement, gritted my teeth and ran.

At one point I was actually running and hollering – that holler you make when you’re frustrated and tired and angry and don’t want to be doing what you’re doing.

1.2 miles to go and I’m grinding. My brain is big and empty. There’s nothing but road.

So close. Still on pace for the goal. Run. Run! Finish strong.

Can’t manage a smile for the race photographers. It would be a lie anyway.

Turn the corner toward the finish line. .2 miles to go. I’m going to make it. I hear the PA announcer blabbering words, but they mean nothing. Why isn’t he telling everybody gathered at the finish line that I’ve DONE IT?!?

I cross the timing strip. Hit the stop button on the Garmin. And there it is.


I take my medal, look up at the sky and say out loud, “Thank you, Jesus!”


26.4 miles
163 avg heart rate
11:17 avg pace
2819 calories burned


Target Pace: 11:26

  1. 11:03
  2. 11:30
  3. 11:12
  4. 11:34
  5. 10:58
  6. 11:15
  7. 11:30
  8. 10:57
  9. 11:16
  10. 11:21
  11. 11:05
  12. 11:15
  13. 11:02
  14. 11:07
  15. 11:17
  16. 11:01
  17. 11:30
  18. 12:05
  19. 11:01
  20. 11:10
  21. 11:22
  22. 11:19
  23. 11:20
  24. 11:16
  25. 12:10
  26. 11:33
  27. 3:51.5

Total weekly miles: 36.4

Compare to Last Week

Weeks to Atlanta Thanksgiving Half-Marathon: 3-ish