Tag Archive | Sexual Assault

Links of the Week – March 20, 2015

shittyperson

* The End Of White Christian America Is Nigh: Why The Country’s Youth Are Abandoning Religious Conservatism

* Justice System to 13-Year-Old Girl: It’s Not Rape Because You Have Curves – (Women, if you’re not enraged yet, you’re not paying attention.)

* Cops On An 11-Year-Old Who Says She Was Raped: “Child’s Promiscuous Behavior Caused This”

* Pope Francis’s Pledge Of Zero Tolerance For Child Abusers Being Tested In Chile

* Alpha Males And Sexual Abuse Of Women

* Understanding Abusers: There Is No Stereotype For Offenders

* “I Am Called A Whore”: Ashley Judd Unloads On The Internet’s Grossest Trolls

* “Son Of A Bitch!” Jon Stewart Hammers “Disingenuous” GOP And “Dumb-Ass” Dems Over Anti-Sex Trafficking Fiasco – (As he should. Fuckers.)

god-doesn't-care
* National Organization Of Women – (Stand up for women! God doesn’t seem to be helping.)

* Put A Woman On The $20!

* Behold The Unexpected Awesomeness Of The Taco Doughnut

* Racist Oklahoma Video A Sign Of Regression In Race Relations In America

* Millennials Are More Racist Than They Think

* PostSecret: If Jesus Were Here – (He does…)

* PostSecret: Babar

* Find A Death: The Death Of Jeanine Deckers: The Singing Nun – (“It took fourteen years for Jeannine to give up the ‘friend’ thing and sip from the furry cup and join the Order of the Practical Shoes.” And then I died! 😀 )

* Find A Death: The Death of Greg Plitt – (Leg day! 😀 )

* For When You Think That No One Will Ever Love You

love
* Disenchanted With Losing, Andy Landers Calls It Quits After 36 Years Of Coaching The Lady Dogs – (A pioneer in women’s basketball, and the only Lady Dog coach I’ve ever known.)

* Psalm 37: How To Receive The Desires Of Your Heart – (As long as God decides it’s OK. And he doesn’t have anything better to do. And he really exists. Now does that really sound like granting the desires of MY heart? No. It does not.)

God-is-In-Control-300x239

* A Boy And Her Dog: Mail Is Not A Gender

* A Boy And Her Dog: Topless In The Locker Room

* A Womanonymous: Shock

* A Womanonymous: Wild Offering – (Post of the Week)

miss

* Black Bear Lodge Adventure Therapy – (I wonder how much this costs…)

* Workplace Suicide Rates Rise Sharply

disappointment

* 21 Harsh Truths No One Tells Teens

* 5 Reasons To Suspect That Jesus Never Existed

* Catcher David Ross’ Approach To Game Anything But Routine – (Oh, Rossy! My favorite!)

* Contributions Of David Ross Go Beyond The Numbers

* Joe Maddon Is Binge-Watching ‘The Office’ At Cubs’ Spring Training – (Oh, Joe! My favorite!)

* Largest Group Of U.S. Presbyterian Churches Allows Same-Sex Marriages – (OK, Methodists. We’re starting to look like backward-ass snake handlers now! Left behind, indeed!)

* From Patrick Stewart’s Birthday Party – (Can I get these guys to come to my birthday party?!?)

* When People Ask Me About My Job

* My Weekend Plans

* For The Bodybuilder/Weightlifter/Harry Potter Fan In Your Life

* Sheetcake Arrives At Banquet Saying “Stewardshit” – (Also, DAVID TENNANT!)

* Genderqueer Fashion

* Fuck Yeah, Androgyny!

* Fake Self-Help Books – (!!!)

* “Life’s Lil Pleasures” Mini Book – (The. BEST! ❤ ❤ ❤ )

* Nine Handy Curses Appropriate For Modern Life – (“May your coffee always be decaf.”)

* Creekside Cabin: Pet Friendly Cabin On The Creek – (It may be time to plan a vacation week…)

* You Can Now Anonymously Send A “Bag Of Dicks” To Your Enemies (Or Your Friends?)

fear-kills-more-dreams-than-failure-ever-will

* Do Cats Dream?

* Awesomely Luvvie: “Pastor” Creflo Dollar Is Trying To Raise $65 Millon For A Plane

* Awesomely Luvvie: Dear Fellow Christians, About This Christ Crutch We Use To Justify Foolery…

hoes

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

“Humans will always place our trust in things that will fail us. We will always insist on giving pieces of our heart to things that simply cannot love us back.”

– Nadia Bolz-Weber, “A Sermon On Addiction…”

“How come if you don’t give up on the person you love, the Hallmark Channel calls that ‘romance;” but on the Lifetime Network, if you don’t give up on the person you love, they call it ‘stalking?”’

Deanna Dennis

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Links of the Week – December 26, 2014

3037655-slide-s-12-social-justice-kitten

 

* Boston Red Sox BamVino Bottle Holder

* Douglasville’s Elana Meyers Taylor Wins In Calgary

* Growing Up Gender-Nonconforming Amid Scolding, Awkward Silences

* NORAD’s Santa Tracker Began With A Typo And A Good Sport

* 23 Of The Cutest Things That Have Ever Happened On Tumblr

* Bobsled History: Elana Meyers Taylor To Compete In Four-Man Event – (First women to compete in this event – EVER!)

* A List Of Pope Francis’ 15 “Ailments Of The Curia” – (Go on with your bad self, Pope!)

* Religion’s Smart People Problem: The Shaky Intellectual Foundations Of Absolute Faith – (I wrestle mightily with this…)

* Why So Many Rich Americans Think They’re Middle-Class

* Patrick Stewart And Jonathan Frakes Can’t Hold It Together

* Star Trek Book Of Opposites – (Why didn’t I get this for Christmas???)

* Stay Single And Proud This Holiday Season – (THIS! 😀 )

* What’s Gender Got To Do With It: Is Recovery Different For Women? – (I’ve been debating this with some evangelists recently. This gets it right.)

* C Is For This Awesome Cookie Monster Christmas – (You gotta see this!)

* Katie Hnida’s Historic Football Story Not A Fairy Tale

* Seasonal Depression Kicks In Just In Time To Numb Woman Before Holiday With Family – (Perfect! 😀 )

* Avoiding Family Conflict During The Holiday Season – (The Onion nails it!)

* How To Navigate The Holidays Alone – (Aaaaaand The Onion writes my life…)

* Space Cat Shower Curtain

* Lumpy Space Princess Shower Curtain

* Jesus Died For Your Sims T-Shirt – (Amazing!)

* Magic Middles Chocolate-Filled Cookie Recipe

* Pierzynski At Least A Colorful Braves Addition – (Oh, great…)

* Gingerbread Enterprise – (For Mason…)

* Dr. Who Paper Snowflake Patterns – (Allons y!)

* The Department Of Unexpected Interspecies Friendship – ❤ ❤ ❤

* Obama Breaks Cardinal Presidential Rule By Donning Tiara

* Social Justice Kittens

* Baddest Mother Ever: Fartbuster’s Worst Fear – (Blog Post of the Week)

Links of the Week – December 5, 2014

beachstars

 

* For These Millennials, Gender Norms Have Gone Out Of Style

* Man Admits To Being Spider-Man In Touching Obituary – (LOVE this!)

* Sprinkle Bakes: Baklava Cheesecake – (Lawd Jesus! This calls for another…)

TAMBOURINE PRAISE BREAK!!!

* How I Learned To Love The Holidays

* Will Riker – Thug Life!

* NASA Prepares To Test New Spacecraft

* It’s A Sad Day: Clip Art Is Dead

* Woman Launches Into 4-Minute Self-Deprecating Preamble Before Speaking Mind

* No One Should Have The Right To Die Before God Is Done Toying With Them

* Temple University Receives Anonymous Donation To Build Center For Discrediting Rape Allegations

* Bill Cosby Offers To Sit Down With Us And Explain The Allegations Against Him Over A Glass Of Wine

* Major League Baseball Umpire Dale Scott Reveals He Is Gay

* Panaluu Beach – Rogellio Bernal Andreo – Deep Sky Colors – (Awesome – in the true sense of the word.)

* Orion Poised For First Trip To Space – (A really good overview of the mission)

* What Should We Call Me: When Everyone Around Me Is Excelling In Their Careers, And I’m Just Like…

* 5 Ways To Keep Her Happy – (Yes, yes, yes! Surprise me!)

* Handwriting/Signature Bracelets – (Cool!)

* 35 Pictures That Prove The World Isn’t Such A Bad Place – (Sniff!)

* A Quest For The Unattainable Unification of Knowledge – (Whoa…)
mindblown

* 5 Overlooked Qualities Of A Great Romantic Partner

* The Sellers Of “Cards Against Humanity” Sold Actual Bull Poop To Customers On Black Friday

* Kennesaw Mosque Deemed Too Close To Ground Zero

* From UVA To Cosby, The Rape Denial Playbook That Won’t Go Away – (THIS!!! Preach, sister!)

* 10 Ways A Good Woman Will Make You A Better Man

==================================================

“I’m going to take responsibility for all my pain looking beautiful and all I’ve made out of my strife.”
– Lady Gaga

==================================================

Links of the Week – November 28, 2014

tumblr_ndotd21ctS1r0mmlao1_500

– 5 Powerful Reasons You Deserve A Happy Relationship

Town Rejects “Hermaphrodite” Winnie The Pooh As Playground Mascot

Atheist, Humanist, Satanist, and Pastafarian Holiday Displays on Public Land

Doing Heroin With My Dad

Europa Remastered Image May Be Prelude To Mission Campaign

Lt. Geordi La Corg

Girls Getting Fed Up With School Dress Codes That Treat Them As Distractions To Be Shamed and Covered Up

New Oreo Biscuit Bites from Church’s Chicken To Debut December 1st – (Lawd Jesus that sounds amazing! Tambourine Praise Break!!!)

Hamsters Enjoy A Tiny Thanksgiving Feast – (Dawwwwwww!)

hula seventy: the jar of magical thinking – (Amazing!)

“If We Left, They Wouldn’t Have Nobody”

If You Needed More Proof That Kittens Are Theraputic, Watch This

Beckham’s Catch Meets Anchorman, Kim K As Meme Craziness Explodes

Is Dark Energy Gobbling Dark Matter And Slowing Universe’s Expansion? – (The comments…)

It’s Not An Orgasm Problem

Ex-NFL Lineman Jason Brown Left Football To Pursue His Dream of Being A Farmer – (Donates 100,000 lbs. of sweet potatoes to food pantries!)

–  NASA Clears Orion Spacecraft For 1st Test Flight Next Week

Mom’s Plea: Please Don’t Help My Kids – (Awesomesauce!)

Likelihood Of Ever Getting More Ink For My Printer

Report Finds Missed Chances To Help Newtown Shooter Adam Lanza

Shifting Attitudes At Play In Cosby Allegations

Odell Beckham Jr. Gets A Big Assist – (You wouldn’t BELIEVE how easy it is to catch wearing receiver gloves!)

What Chance Does Brooklyn Have Of Following In Dad David Beckham’s Footsteps – (Just an excuse to look at pictures of David Beckham! *sigh* Gorgeous!)

becks

 

Links of the Week – November 21, 2014

peanut-butter-and-jelly-bars-3-410x616

 

* Why Your Brain Wants To Help One Child In Need – But Not Millions

* China’s 1st Round-Trip Moon Shot Sets Stage For Bigger Lunar Feats

* Tom Brokaw’s Phone Alarm Goes Off On TV

* Peanut Butter And Jelly Bars – (Making these this weekend!)

* On Bob Feller’s Birthday, We Remember The Time His Fastball Was Measured By Army Equipment

* Phish Plays Concert In SF, Breaks Out Into “We Are The Champions” Mid-Song When Giants Win

* 15 Things Men Need To Know About Women

* Midterms: Did Americans Get What They Want? – (Great article!)

* You Don’t Protect My Freedom: Our Childish Insistence On Calling Soldiers Heroes Deadens Real Democracy – (Spot on)

* ‘Promise Me’ Necklace – ❤ ❤ ❤

* Ohio State Marching Band Does Impressive Star Trek Themed Halftime Show – (Awesome sauce!)

* Catching Up With Trek’s Lt. Kevin Riley…Bruce Hyde – (I’ll take you HOOOOME again, Kathleeeeeeen!)

* PostSecret: Hurt

* Cock Block

* Meet Monty: The Adorable Cat With An Unusual Face

* Royals’ Rise Managed Adeptly By Yost

* Make Fulton County Animal Services Pets Thankful, and LifeLine Animal Project Will Wave The Adoption Fee in November

* Seattle Seahawks Mascot Apologizes For Pre-Game Incident – (Hysterical!)

* How Animals Hacked The Rainbow And Got Stumped On Blue – (Fascinating)

* Common Core Reading: ‘The New Colossus’

* Bizarre Baseball Culture: Post-Schulz Peanuts Go To Tokyo In “It’s Tokyo, Charlie Brown!” – (Wonderful!)

* Craigslist Missed Connections: ‘You Farted In Kroger’ – (Maybe the funniest thing I read this week…)

* What Should We Call Me: Makeup Game

* Straight People Should Leave Homophobic Churches

* The Devastating Pattern Of Sexual Abuse In Competitive Swimming – (I’m becoming furious….)

* Report Finds New Orleans Police Department Basically Ignored Calls Reporting Sex Crimes, Child Abuse – (How long are we going to keep looking the other way…?)

* Actress Barbara Bowman: Bill Cosby Raped Me – Why Wasn’t I Believed – (How long will society continue to ignore the cries of our mothers and sisters and daughters…?)

* “Honey Boo Boo” Star Mama June Reveals Father Of Two Daughters Is Sex Offender – (How long will we offer our children to predators…?)

* Cobb Softball Coach Facing Child Porn Charges – (How long will men feel free and privileged to prey on women and little girls with little fear of serious punishment…?)

* The White House Asks Men To Stop Campus Sex Abuse – (Imagine a man touching your mother, your wife, your sister or your daughter – fondling her breasts, touching her genitals, kissing her, sodomizing her, fucking her – all against her will. And imagine that she will be so ashamed and fearful that she won’t tell. Why should she if she won’t be believed, or if the incident won’t be investigated – if people will just tell her that she was asking for it, that it was her fault – or if people just don’t care? Now imagine how this will screw with her head for the rest of her life. It’s time to SCREAM and RAISE HELL about this. WE DESERVE BETTER!)

Ani DiFranco
“Hide & Seek”

Me and all the kids from the neighborhood
We’d play out in the street all summer long.
Rule was we had to go home at night,
When the street lights came on.
We were oblivious to the rest of the world.
And we’d hold up the cars in the street.
Yeah, we’d always play boys against girls,
And both sides would cheat.

Strange men would stop their cars at the curb
Say: “Hey sweetheart come here.”,
And I’d go up to the window and they’d have their dick out in their hand
With a sick little sneer.
And I’d say
“Here we go again! Yeah, ok this time you win.”
And I would feel dirty, I’d feel ashamed,
But I wouldn’t let it stop my game.

We would play hide and go seek.
Territory would be the whole block.
Sometimes the older boys when they’d find you,
They wouldn’t want to tag you, they’d just want to talk.
They’d say “What would you do for a quarter? Come on, we don’t have that much time.”
And I’d think a minute and I’d say:
“Ok…give me the quarter first. Fine.”
This time you win.
Here we go again!
And I would feel dirty and I would feel ashamed,
But I wouldn’t let it stop my game.

I remember my first trip alone on the greyhound bus,
And the man who put his hands on me to see where his knife fell
And I remember when I left how excited I was
And I remember when I arrived I didn’t feel so well.
I remember the teacher at school got me so sick and scared
I went into the bathroom and threw up in my hair
And I could go on, but you know, it just gets worse
So I think I’ll stop there…

Girl, next time he wants to know
What your problems is…
Girl, next time he wants to know
Where the anger comes from…
Just tell him this time the problem’s his.
Tell him the anger just comes.
It just comes.

 

 

Molestation: The Questions That Linger

Quotation-Marilyn-J-Sorensen-shame-guilt-Meetville-Quotes-146021

Peeling back one layer and healing it exposes the next. As we go deeper, a girl may say, ‘You know, I’ve never told anyone about this because I was too embarrassed (or because it didn’t seem important… she was afraid… she didn’t think anyone would believe her… or she thought it was her fault). But I think you should know.’

If these traumas are mentioned at all early on in counseling, it’s typically in conjunction with, ‘But that was years ago and I’m over it now.’ The hidden message behind this tough talk is often, ‘ I have spent a lot of energy and time trying to numb myself from feelings and to forget anything associated with this painful event. I would rather not talk about it. I choose to ignore these painful emotions rather than confront them, because I’m fairly certain I wouldn’t survive those overwhelming feelings.'”

The White Umbrella, Mary Frances Bowley, pp. 84-85

I still ask myself…

 – Why didn’t anybody in my family believe his previous accusers and keep it from happening to me?

 – Am I making it a bigger deal than I really should?

 – Why did it never occur to me to tell?

 – If I had told would it have protected his other victims?

 – What kind of monster would DO these things to children year after year?

 – I know there are things about the molestation I don’t remember. What are they? What if they’re horrific?

 – Why didn’t I stop him?

 – Is this the cause of so many of my insecurities and self-doubt and self-loathing, or do I just use it as an excuse to feel sorry for myself?

 – Is it the reason I have so many problems in relationships, or do I just use it as an excuse to cover up my shortcomings? 

 – Why do I still get so anxious – heart pounding, short of breath – when I think about it?

 – What would the resolution to this even be or look like in my life?

 – Do I have to forgive?

 – Do I have to stop being angry?

Isn’t it easier, less painful and less self-destructive to just keep repressing it and numbing it, to not pick at that scab?